Saturday, July 29, 2006
it's amazing how some people make you feel so down, when it's their duty to do just the opposite
Suliana Hot Momma at 11:34 PM
Sunday, July 23, 2006
a few down, many more to go...i still miss u...
it's not easy. it really isnt. life doesnt get harder than this. but i know it's gonna be. i know Allah will push me to a point where i never thought i will reach. i'm sure that He is gonna challenge me until i am the strongest that i can ever be. mentally, physically, academically and in every aspect of my life. yes ppl, i realise that my future is the biggest hurdle i'm going to face.but pls, i'm tired. i'm sooo exhausted. yes i know i can get thru this. with Rina, my family and my friends by my side. it's a fact that i got thru a few hurdles before. problem with my confidence, problem with my studies, problems with my parents, finding out who i really am. those stuff are nothing lah compared to this. but i know i have it in me to jump over this hurdle. and yes, i have every confidence that life would be much better after that. much much better than what i'm going thru now.
just now i made myself a cup of teh. very nice, sweet, 2 packets in 1 cup of teh. i put it aside and continued to finish washing the very dirty dishes. while washing, Rina opened the fridge and started making a fuss. she was trying to reach for something and kept moaning "Rina nak...Rina nak..". i remained calm and told her patiently that Mama will help her as soon as she finishes. so ok, the dishes were done, i helped Rina put her cereal in a bowl, i grabbed my teh and settled down in front of the tv. Rina being her kaypoh-self of course asked for sips of teh. me being in my malas-nak-layan-pasal-nak-dier-tido-cepat-pasal-nak-habiskan-lessonplan-mode gave in to her. cut the story short, Rina dropped the cup, teh spilled on the tilam and i blew my top off.
and me being soft-hearted and bad-tempered ALWAYS regret blowing my top off. feeling overwhelmed, i stopped for a moment and thought of who to call. but at last, i kissed Rina and reassured her that Mama doesnt hate her. i sat down and decided to blog. i explained to her that it's very difficult for Mama and that if she behaves this way every day, Mama will be very tired. of course Rina doesnt understand a word i said. but yeah, i tried. maybe 1 day she'll understand. maybe...
oh, and i have 4 observations to go. which means i have an ob every day of the week. except for my last day. i hope ah. practicum sucks lah...
Ya Allah, ampunilah segala dosa-dosaku. Jauhikanlah syaitan daripadaku dan berilah iman kepadaku. Ya Allah, aku hanyalah hambamu yg lemah. Beriku kekuatan dan tunjuklah jalan yg benar.
Al-fateha untuk Haji Rahim bin Hassan.
Atuk, Nana masih rindukan Atuk. Semalam Nenek ceritakan Atuk selalu dukung Nana bila Nana masih di kindergarten. Bila akan kita bertemu lagi? Bila lagi Nana boleh cium tangan Atuk dan peluk Atuk? Kenapa mesti Atuk pergi tinggalkan kami? Nana belum sempat cakap Nana sayangkan Atuk.
i have to stop. i cant see the words thru the tears in my eyes. i read it somebody's blog that she always salam her husband and seek forgiveness from him every night before they go to sleep. why didnt i do that before? now i'll never have the chance.
Suliana Hot Momma at 10:15 PM
Monday, July 17, 2006
get ur facts rite people!
Materazzi, 32, told Gazetta dello Sport: 'I held his shirt for a few seconds only, then he turned to me and talked to me, jeering. He looked at me with a huge arrogance and said, 'If you really want my shirt I'll give it to you afterwards'. I replied with an insult, that's true.'(Sarcasm by Zizou, Honesty by Marco)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
He has denied, however, some of the more vile insults referring to his wife or sister or calling him a terrorist.'It was one of those insults you're told dozens of times and that you often let fall on a pitch,' Materazzi said.
'I did not call him a terrorist. I am not a cultured person and I don't even know what an Islamist terrorist is.'
He added: 'For me the mother is sacred, you know that.'
(why? read below)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Materazzi himself, who scored the equaliser for Italy on Sunday, made a statement of his own while Zidane was speaking on French television.'I didn't mention anything about religion, politics or racism,' he said. 'I didn't insult his mother. I lost my mother when I was 15 years old and still get emotional when I talk about it.
'Naturally, I didn't know that his mother was in hospital but I wish her all the best. 'Zidane is my hero and I have always admired him a lot.'
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Final note: Marco has nothing to lose while Zizou has his reputation to keep. Think about that people.Source: Soccernet World Cup 2006
p.s.- while i still LOVE my Ricardo Carvalho, Rooney is right. He didnt do it purposely. I have seen the repeat a lot of times and read his explanation. There was no way he could have known Carvalho's unmentionables were lying just behind him. And as Rooney said, if he were doing it intentionally, Carvalho would still be in the hospital now. so FIFA, open ur eyes BIGGER.
Suliana Hot Momma at 2:13 PM
Monday, July 10, 2006
how to sing 'we are the champions' in italian eh?
1. i woke up during halftime. dammit!2. 2nd half was great. my heart almost stopped a few times but yeah, Buffon held on. phew!
3. alamak, extra time.
4. bodohnyerrrrr Zidane. such a fantastic football career ended with a headbutt because he cannot contain his anger.
5. alamak, penalty shootout!
6. but Shera says tt France is in trouble because there are no more good players left to take the penalties. i told myself not to have high hopes because i know that anything can happen in a penalty shootout.
7. tt handsome french (i dont know how to spell his name) missed his shot. i think he was aiming for the top corner. but oppss, aiming was a bit off.
8. grosso scores the winning goal!!!!
9. ok, it took like 5 seconds for me to 'register' tt my Italians juz won the World Cup.
10. 5 seconds later, woohoooooooo! yesssSSSSAH!!! i opened the balcony and screamed. i screamed out of my master bedroom window. juz in case not everybody in choa chu kang knew tt Italy are CHAMPIONS. heh.
11. i jumped arnd (literally!). i couldnt help it, was too full of energy.
12. watched them get their medals and lift up the trophy. my tears welled up. i have no reasons to back this up but hell, they really deserve it. esp e 'veteran' stars, namely del piero, totti n inzaghi. totti went up wif e Italian flag covering his head. the commentators were wondering which player it was. haha.
13. i'm gonna wear my Italy jacket EVERY DAY!!
14. abt 10 mins after, e Italians juz finished their 8th lap of honour. heh.
15. if i dont stop blogging now, i'll be late for school. k bye!
Suliana Hot Momma at 5:42 AM
Sunday, July 09, 2006
1st (bad)impression
before i start, no offence to my friends. it wasnt ur fault.i went to esplanade today happy. i wore the baju i planned to wear and since it was gonna be my 1st time in the theatre, naturally i was excited. Rina was in her usual moods i.e. suka2, happy to be outside with her mama n her nenek.
we wanted to go in 1st. but was stopped by the usher. i felt irritated bcos i knew tt Rina could go in. why the hell were they so 'ngada-ngada'?? i said "if my daughter cant go in, tt means me n my mother cant too. so we bought the tickets for nothing?? n we're juz wasting our money??" with as much sarcasm as i could.
n we still had to stand there for a while, waiting for them to let us go in. by the time we were given the greenlight, my irratition turned to upset. i told them straight "my friend said children could go in. but yet you initially didn't let us go in. i think you people must have a little more communication" with a harsh tone.
when the usher(a different one) saw Rina, he asked the EXACT same qn "how old is the child?" i had to explain tt the management allowed us to go in. haiyor.....why are they so inconsistent?? i expected better from the people who runs our national icon, the 'durian'.
so yeah, we went in. n had to climb THREE flights of stairs. apparently we could have taken an escalator. BUT, the usher didnt tell us. !!! i sat for a while den had to go out to pass tickets. wen i came back, the door was already closed n i had to wait for an interval before i could go in. i pleaded with the usher at the door. i said my daughter will cry if i dont go in. STILL he didnt let me in. at last Rina n my mother came out bcos they were ushered out as soon as Rina started crying. but she got worse bcos she wanted to go in. of course the usher didnt allow tt. so Rina continued crying ah. with everybody(read: stupid ppl) watching. "eh hello! u wanna look?? den fine, YOU make her stop crying ah. if not, den ur juz a KEPO!"
so e interval came, n we went in. my 1st thought was "finally i can enjoy the concert. phew..." BUTTTT Rina started crying again. at 1st it was crying. den i heard shhh! from everywhere. heartless people! den she started screaming. even more shhh! from the people ARND us. "ya allah.....as if i can help it lah. i'm supposed to juz 'mute' the volume izzit?! freaking freaks!" n once again, we were ushered out. wen the usher came to us, before he could say anything, i was like "ya ya i know. we're going out NOW!"
end of story, we didnt go back in. we left. Rina was happier. we watched a performance at the waterfront which was FREE. den we had dinner at 2hot halal cafe. den we walked arnd for a bit while waiting for my father to pick us up.
moral of the story: we wasted almost $48. and i expected BETTER treatment/service from the ESPLANADE. it's supposed to be a national icon. the ushers/management are representing Singapore who the foreigners who may come for any show. but of course i'm suuuurrreee foreigners get different treatment. read: better. i am VERY disappointed n considering writing to the straits time abt this.
p.s.-my father paid for the tickets. so i'm not upset abt the money. i REALLY wanted to watch a concert tonight.
Suliana Hot Momma at 3:06 AM
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
delapan hari seminggu
1st week of practicum...how am i doing? i have mixed feelings. it's like every day is e 1st day. know wat i mean??mon-came rite on time. luckily not late. din expect prayers to be so long. national anthem den pledge den school song den 1st prayer den 2nd prayer den 3rd prayer. i was beginning to tremble bcos i have weak knees. had to 'control' myself. i thought i had already prepared myself but it was still a culture shock for me.
tues-came much earlier than i wanted to. i was already in sch when raihan was waiting for e bus. haha...i tink i got paranoid after e previous day. everything was normal, except for e fact tt i STILL cant get used to 'it'. called nenek during recess. so nice to hear her voice. met raihan n dayanah after sch. went shopping @ far east plaza. plan to use robinsons voucher aborted.
wed-a priest came to lead them in e 'prayer after meals'. was quite taken aback to see a priest in sch. but yeah, it IS a catholic sch. they say prayers b4 classes, b4 recess, after recess and b4 dismissal. had my 1st music observation. wah, these p5 boys eh, dunno how to take music seriously. they treat music lesson as e half-an-hr to talk! they better watch out wen i'm e one teaching. during contact time, a senior teacher led e catholic teachers in a prayer for a full 10mins b4 e meeting started. !!!!
thurs-was telling myself tt fri is juz e next day so tt i will have SOME energy in me. got to know my p2 eng n maths classes better. already can recognise some of them by name. specifically e naughty ones and e gifted ones. dis boy came up to me n said "cher, how u know my name ah?" i was like "err...i read ur nametag..." kids ah. so cute.
fri-yay! long weekend ahead. had some complications in my timetable but it was quickly sorted out. my CTs are such nice ladies u noe. a boy in my p2 eng class finally mustered up e courage to ask "cher, why r u always arnd during our eng lessons?" i told him i was gonna teach them soon n tt i chose dis class bcos e pupils need to be disciplined. after tt he shut up. haha...i hope he passed e msg arnd. i wan e whole class to know tt i mean business! met raihan after sch. finally used a $50 voucher. bought 2 skirts. nice. i loike! thanx eh raihan. bumped into other NIE frens @ causeway. joined them @ macs for a while den went hm.
sat-went back to school to watch mly dance practice. e instructor is soooo garang. remind me to story u all abt her 1 day eh. den balik nenek house. ibu brought rina over. aper lagi, enjoy lah budak 3 tu. even bathed together. now they even have matching watches. haha...
sun-whole day @ hm. enuff said.
mon-went out with raihan n fana. finally went to mindcafe. yay! den joined parents, rina n nenek for dinner @ banana leaf. e food is fantastic! n e indian waiters are so nice. even helped us take pictures.
e weeks' photos HERE
p.s.-i like dis song(title) by syuga! so cute.
Suliana Hot Momma at 1:40 AM
Sunday, July 02, 2006
a picture says a thousand words
Ferdinand was devastated to lose on penalties to the Portuguese after a goalless 120 minutes in Gelsenkirchen, when Wayne Rooney was sent off in the second-half.
Ferdinand said: 'To lose on penalties again is sickening but the lads put a great effort in. It just wasn't to be. We didn't falter with 10 men. Even with 10 men we were the team who created the best chances.'
Frank Lampard admitted he broke down in tears after England's exit which came at the end of a disappointing tournament for the Chelsea midfielder.
He said: "It is the worst feeling I've ever experienced. I don't want to talk too much and I am devastated. I cried a couple of times at the end of the game.
The World Cup is the ultimate. Deep down I really believed we could go all the way....the tears were there.
The worst thing about it is we thought this was going to be our time with the players we had and I thought we produced our best performance of the tournament against Portugal.
We showed a lot of guts and even with 10 men we went at them and went for the win. We didn't sit back and hope for penalties and extra-time."
Suliana Hot Momma at 10:04 AM
it hurts...it's very painful...
last nite, i fell asleep while watching e 1st half of e germany vs argentina match. i missed watching e germans beat my argentinians. needless to say, i also din watch my italians play. a part of me was heartbroken bcos i sacrificed 2 nites of football(i'm in e morning session btw) and was sooo looking forward to watching e 1st 2 matches of e quarter-finals. but it was entirely my fault and i couldnt do anything abt it anyway.juz arnd 4 hrs ago, i started watching e portugal vs england match with high hopes. dont ask me why but i really felt tt england was going to perform tonite. n they did. even without their captain. but yet it wasnt enough.
a. e only reason why rooney was sent off = he suppposedly pushed ronaldo
b. why rooney pushed ronaldo = ronaldo happened to be at e 'scene'
c. why ronaldo was at e 'scene'= bcos he's such a mat kepo!
d. therefore, e ONLY reason why rooney was sent off = ronaldo is a mat kepo who doesnt know how to mind his own business
why did he have to rush to e 'scene'? i'm SURE tt he said something to rooney to provoke him. if i were rooney, i would have punched his sickening face. a push is not enough for an ego like ronaldo's.
ok, tt aside. england battled on for e rest of e match, INCLUDING extra time. i am esp proud of e defenders - terry, ferdinand, a. cole n p.neville. there was a controversial penalty not given when lennon was brought down. but yeah, like e referee cares rite. i will NEVER forget horacio elizondo's face.
in e end, it came down to penalties. dammit! it's bad ah bcos anybody who supports england knows how bad they are at penalties. but nvm, at least my boys still had a chance. when lampard missed, my hopes shattered. i knew if we wanted to win this, we would need a miracle. then viana missed n hargreaves scored. ok ok, maybe a miracle was happening! but it went downhill frm then on. e guy with e sickeningly sickening face scored e winning penalty.
my heart broke(again) but what happened after tt crushed it. ferdinand was crying. as in facedown-disappointed-heart-breaking-crying. dis is e same man who was banned frm playing football n took tt in his stride confidently. n there he was, CRYING. my eyes automatically teared. then e camera shot terry with teary eyes. gerrard had his face between his knees. e whole scene was...i dunno...i cant find a word to describe it.
i end with e words of e one who coached his last game, "...it hurts...it's very painful..." yes eriksson, i know.
Suliana Hot Momma at 2:04 AM
